On Thursday, he chose her. He said he wanted to get back in touch with her, just to see if something would come of it. He asked what my reaction would be, and I said I’d leave as soon as possible, because I won’t have her even tangentially in my life. He accepted that.
On Friday, we mentally divided our possessions and pets. It’s going to be awhile yet before I have a place to go, but the major things are decided. I broke down and cried so many times that morning.
Later in the day on Friday, I found my wedding dress in the farmhouse. It was beautiful. It was horrible. It was the dead carcass of a dream.
It brought up all the feelings I had back then, all the dreams and wishes that we tried to realize. How far we’d come and how far we thought we’d go together. But he chose her.
I threw away the wedding dress.
Hey, it’s the full moon. You could do an amazing releasing ceremony where you write all of the things you want to let go of *on the dress* and then burn it.
I love you!
Alas, the county is under a burn ban. Otherwise, that’s a fantastic idea!