One winter’s night, there was a rent in the clouds directly above, and looking straight up into nothingness, I could feel the cold of the universe pouring down upon me. That’s not how thermodynamics works. Logical Me knows that, but you won’t convince Emotional Me that I couldn’t feel
On the first, Cody and I walked around the place, talking about future plans, much like we did last January. While the house renovation has slowed down some this last year, we did accomplish a lot. My favorite part of these conversations are when he asks, for example, “What would
Okay, it is, but not really. I only wrote here once in 2022, but with my distaste for social media growing, and Twitter imploding, I want to start using this space more. It’s my day off for New Year’s, and I’m trying to be productive without overdoing. My legs hurt
I feel like everything is going so well, but somehow, I’m only hanging onto my life by my fingernails. I’m not suicidal or anything like that, I’m just drowning. My partner and I are engaged, and every day since he asked, I’ve been positively joyous about it. It isn’t fading
I’m decidedly not okay sometimes, and I can’t quite identify what I’m feeling or what caused it. I’m just writing my stream of consciousness, hoping it’ll help. Mom was more forgetful than usual today, but she was cheerful about it. It rips me apart to lose her inch by inch.
Since 2020 screwed with my sense of time, I haven’t been able to regain it. Because so many things have changed since I last wrote, I was sure it had been months – plural – since I’d written anything here. Things are going suspiciously well again, with the exception of
Every time I think I get a handle on what my new normal is, it changes. My adaptability skills are being tested, and I’m doing okay with that. It just takes some time for my brain to catch up to reality. Everything is going suspiciously well. Work isn’t as frustrating
I feel like the lake is actively welcoming me back. I walked halfway around it this evening, making some zen moments videos like this one. I kept finding wishing stones. One after another, after another. I ended up with six. Normal is finding one per walk around the whole lake.